You know someone has moved on from a relationship once he or she can talk freely about it. After months of silence, Nikki Gil is not just ready to talk about her failed relationship with Billy Crawford. She describes her painful but rewarding journey as a woman who learns from her past.
“It felt like a 24/7 nightmare. There were days when I wish I was just asleep the whole day,” the new brand ambassador of Maldita says.
No, Nikki says, she’s not bitter about the whole thing. It’s just that up to now, she couldn’t figure out where she went wrong.
“I don’t flirt when I’m in a relationship. I don’t want to do anything that will someday be done to me. I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t do anything to deserve it.”
Instead of talking to the press and publicly reacting to Billy’s statements on “The Buzz,” Nikki kept her mouth shut and flew to the US “to grieve.” The distance and the change of environment did wonders.
“You wake up one morning and you’re fine,” Nikki, her red top reflecting a courage she kept hidden from the press all along, relates.
Now, Nikki is a far cry from the conservative woman people have thought her to be all along, the kind who keeps quiet when issues crop up; the type who always acted within bounds. She does seductive poses in the Maldita video, and goes sexy in some of the photos for the brand. The self-assurance is telling; the self-confidence refreshing.
“Independence makes a woman sexy. There’s something sexy about a woman who can take care of herself and doesn’t need people to see her through,” Nikki proclaims.
She admits her breakup with Billy has a lot to do with her in-your-face stance.
“Na-conquer ko na yung pinagdaanan ko. Lahat ng mga babae na may pinagdaanan, it brings out a certain courage, strength and drive to better yourself.”
And because she isn’t bitter at all, Nikki has started going out on friendly dates again. She’s having fun meeting new people and looking her best. But she’s not looking into anything serious for now.
“Hindi ako ang tipong tao who will jump to the next relationship. You hurt people that way.”
She’s not dating men from showbiz for now.
“Rest tayo diyan. Ayaw ko ng ganong trauma. Hindi naman sa nag-ja-judge ako kasi ayaw kong kainin ang sailita ko. But (non-showbiz relationships) are less complicated. Complicated na nga ang life ko, times two pa natin."
If there’s anything Nikki wants others to get from her experience, it’s the fact that one can turn a nightmare into a dream come true.
“Eveything happens for a reason. I believe in destiny. I’m just grateful and overwhelmed na ang bait ni God sa akin. He’s given me such a good life and saved me from whatever. May bonus pa!”
Billy and Coleen
Nikki doesn’t let talks that Billy is dating Coleen Garcia bother her.
“Narinig ko na namataan sila sa mga parties. That’s none of my business. Ayaw ko balikan ang nakaraan.”
“You can’t please everybody. There are times when you just have to be quiet. There are things you don’t just discuss.”
Nikki has also learned to bow to a Higher Power when it comes to her love life.
“I’m letting God write my love story because once upon a time, I took control of it and it didn’t work well.”
These words can’t help but inspire other women who, like Nikki, have loved and lost, and are willing to let others learn from her story.
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