Kanye West's Wonderful World of Sex Tapes
The college dropout may have more than one intimate encounter caught on video. Elsewhere in today's celebrity gossip: Natalie Portman has a dramatic new look, Anjelica Huston is turning her house into a club, and Katie Holmes reconnects with an old friend from Capeside.
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There was one rumor floating around last week that Kim Kardashian's new stylist, Kanye West, had some sort of sex tape that someone got a hold of and it was now making the rounds, and we all sighed about that and said, "What can ya do?" But now there's a rumor of a second sex tape, and we're beginning to worry that these things are going to start popping up on websites or wherever sex tapes pop up. Even more alarming is that TMZ says both videos depict feats of endurance: "Both tapes are impressively long -- the first is roughly twenty minutes ... and the second is more than FORTY. And we're talking constant action. Seriously, the guy takes no breaks. It's incredible. Almost Sting-like." Which, OK, forty minutes without a break, sure, but 20 minutes? That's not that much time, TMZ. Kinda says more about you than it does about Kanye, honestly. But whatever. The point is, Kanye West has multiple sex tapes according to some shadowy people. Neither are with Kim Kardashian, but both are definitely with human females, because that is what Kanye West is into. Nothing but human females for Kanye West, and hey now there's video, lots of video!, to prove it. [TMZ]
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So Anjelica Huston owns a house in Venice Beach that she calls The Fortress, and for good reason. It is almost 14,000 square feet and has an 1,000 square-foot courtyard and is imposingly walled off from the street. Her late husband, a sculptor, designed it for her, and it's quite the property, but nonetheless Huston wants to sell. The recent development is that she's backing a plan to turn The Fortress into a private "gourmet bathing" club instead of keeping it just a regular house. What, pray tell, might a gourmet bathing club provide for its members? Well: "Venice Social Club plans to charge $2,000 a year for membership and will include a farm-to-table restaurant, gallery, screening room and cultural programing." Sounds nice. But where does the bathing part come in? Ah, here: "gourmet bathing activities will range from surfing, hot-spring excursions, seltzer-water tastings, and dipping in the club’s pool." Which... So two of those things are happening off-site, one is just swimming in the pool, and the other is... seltzer tasting. Don't get us wrong, we are all for seltzer. Seltzer is a vital and important part of life, no joke, but $2,000 a year to taste seltzer with a bunch of other jerks who are willing to pay $2,000 a year to taste seltzer? Buy a damn SodaStream and try seltzer with people you actually like in the comfort of your own home, for heaven's sake. Look, probably it would be nice to have a little chici private swim-swim society but it should maybe offer a little more. I mean, is the restaurant free with membership? That would be nice. Also, given that this is Anjelica Huston we're talking about, this is totally a witch thing, isn't it? "Vitches of California! You may remove your vigs!" [Page Six]
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Natalie Portman "made headline hair news over the weekend" by appearing at some sort of party with dyed blonde hair. She told people that she had it done for a new role, which makes sense. Actors are doing that all the time. But it doesn't stop the hair press from being thrilled and titillated by this insane development! The only thing bigger than this news would be if Jason Statham showed up to a party wearing a Prince Valiant wig with barrettes in it. [Us Weekly]
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Katie Holmes recently called up her old Dawson's Creek flame Joshua Jackson, who played layabout student turned schooner captain turned professional chef turned high-powered Boiler Room-type finance guy (boy did that show get dumb towards the end, huh?) Pacey Witter, and the two had a nice chat and reconnected. Which is wild! And exciting. Katie is getting her old life back. Maybe she's calling Nick Stahl and James Marsden and reminiscing about their old Disturbing Behavior days. "You wanna hear about some disturbing behavior," she cracks, lighting a Winston and putting her feet up on the coffee table. "Well, have I got some stories for you..." Sounds like fun. Have fun, Katie! [Daily Mail]
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Speaking of reunions, on-again/off-again couple Bradley Cooper and Zoe Saldana were spotted leaving the ArcLight movie theater in Hollywood together on Saturday night. The The Words costars might be back together, or they might have just seen a movie together on a Saturday night. Everyone else was busy at pre-Emmys parties and these two are in movies, not TV, anyway, so what else were they really gonna do? I just hope they remembered to get their parking validated and that they saw something good. If they went to see The Words then we're going to have a problem. [People]
Oh, Emmys-wise, here's what everyone was wearing. People looked good, blue was very popular, and Lucy Liu was wearing a robot pelt that she skinned herself on a recent robot hunting trip. (RIP Tagg Romney.) I don't know. Everyone looked nice and Julianne Moore looked terrific. Same as usual. [Us Weekly]
We're all still reeling and grieving in the wake of the news that seminal party pop band LMFAO has called it quits, but at least there is a glimmer of hope on the horizon. Half of LMFAO, uncle Redfoo, he's the worse one with the big Sideshow Bob hair and lame glasses, went partying with that "Gangnam Style" guy, Psy, in Las Vegas over the weekend. So maybe that means the two will musically team up and soon we will have a noise terrible and annoying off to finally do battle against Mothra? We can only hope. Car commercials need more tunes, and Redfoo and Psy could be the hucksters to give them that music. The rest of us will simply wear noise-cancellation headphones at all times for the rest of our lives. Easy peasy. Meanwhile, SkyBlu was seen looking up Smash Mouth's number in the phone book.[Page Six]
The Full House cast recently reunited. Well, all but two of them. (Four of them if you count Nicky and Alex, which you shouldn't.) Guess which two didn't show up. Just take one wild guess. [People]
Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis walked around New York City yesterday, both clad in Chicago Bears paraphernalia. Specifically, T-shirts that say "NYC" on them only the "C" is the Chicago Bears logo. Which makes... Only the barest minimum of sense. Does that mean they went to a "Chicago bar" where other people were wearing these T-shirts, maybe they were even handed out there? Or did Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis have T-shirts specially made to show that they were in New York City but like the Chicago Bears. These are important questions, folks. Very, very important. [Daily Mail]
