#BestSongEver: ‘Piece of This’ by P.O.T.
Editor’s Note: #BestSongEver stories are published every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.
By Pam Lunar
This is a song that soothes my soul. Whenever I feel down, this song seems to understand: here, have a piece of this. It’s like a pill, a sedative that calms my senses. It makes the world look and feel better. Like the man who sang this song, as he always told me, everything will be okay; it always does.
Now and then, I tremble all over.
But I will carry the load upon my shoulder,
But I know this would all be over
If only I could open my eyes.
The late great Karl Roy, a dear beloved friend, had this song in mind as his funeral song. When he mentioned that to me so casually some years ago, I did not take it seriously. I didn’t want to be talking about funerals, most importantly, his.
Met on a school project
I met Karl sometime in the early 90s as I was working on a school project on body art. After that, we’d bump into each other at gigs from time to time, or whenever we hang out with common friends. Sometimes he’d remember me, sometimes he wouldn’t. That was classic Karl.
Little did I know that this man would be a big part of my life.
In 2006, I was at a Kapatid gig when he approached me and asked if I could manage him. So I did.
Kind and gentle soul
And I‘m glad that I did.
It was an honor to represent a good-hearted person, a kind and gentle soul. Karl was one of a kind, a rare find.
I also envied his strength because he fought a good fight and I salute him.
The first call
It was Sunday, March 11,2012, when I got a call from a friend. Karl was rushed to the hospital. I felt my body shaking. I couldn't talk. I took off and when I saw him on the hospital bed wearing an oxygen mask and breathing so heavily, I got so scared.
He took his mask off and whispered to me in his signature raspy voice, “To tell you the truth, I hate the fact that I am fighting for my life.”
So scared
I tried not to make him notice how scared I was, the fear that was deep in my gut.
Then, I too saw his own fear. It was in his eyes and I had never seen him so scared.
We were alone in the room and I knew I had to gather myself and stay strong for the both of us. I wanted to give him the courage to fight.
Farewell to my friends,
Thought I'd leave you all behind, yeah oh no.
My time is runnin'
And I'm about to lose my mind, again.
Now and then, I tremble all over
But I will carry the load upon my shoulder,
But I know this would all be over
If only I could open my eyes.
The second and final call
Days later on March 13, past the hour of 1, my phone rang. It was Karl’s brother Kevin.
When I heard the words, "Pam, hang on to your seat," I felt numb. What I dreaded the most had happened.
I never knew I could feel that kind of inexplicable pain. My mind went blank and my chest felt heavier as the minutes passed by. I kept hoping it was a bad dream. But the pain pierced right through my heart.
Karl got his wish
When I saw him, he looked so peaceful, with that faint smile on his face. I stared at him for a long time. Then, I kissed him on the forehead and said goodbye.
At the wake, there was a big screen, showing photos of him. Then I heard “Piece of This” play. Karl had gotten his wish.
As I listened intently to the song, it was suddenly transformed. Every word had a different meaning.
Free of pain
It was as if he was singing to me, comforting me in one of the saddest, most painful days of my life, like he always does. It was as if he was reminding me once again that everything would be okay. That he'd be okay.
I knew how hard he fought, and it just comforted me to know that he was free of pain. He had been lost and now he’s found.
No more emptiness
No more loneliness
No more melancholy
Have a piece of this
Can anybody help me when I’m down
And everybody sees I’m just a clown
But now I know love will stick around
Cause I've been lost and found
Now I see that sunlight shining through
There's no reason to be blue,
When I know I'm going down,
I look all around me, no I won't frown
A piece of him
Now I understand why he chose this song. It was as if the song was meant to be written for his passing. But the message was clear: no matter how it hurt, I had to accept that Karl has moved on to a better place. It was short, but it was a life well lived.
I am proud, blessed and honored to have known him, to have him in my life, and to have been a part of his—as a fan, a friend, a manager and as family.
Have a piece of this, he sang. That piece of him, I feel so grateful and blessed to have. That piece, I will forever keep.
Pam Lunar is now assistant special projects manager of Yahoo Philippines.
READ more #BestSongEver:
“Just the Two of Us” by Will Smith
“214” by Rivermaya
“Don’t Go Away” by Oasis
“No Ordinary Morning” by Chicane
“Hey Jude” by The Beatles
SHARE the story behind your own #BestSongEver. Simply answer the following:
Name your #BestSongEver and the artist who performed it.
Why is it your #BestSongEver?
Tell us something about yourself (name, age, occupation).
Provide at least 3 horizontal photos of yourself.
Email your story and your photos to: team_yph@yahoo.com , subject line: #BestSongEver.
All published stories are deemed final.